Square-Peg Reflections

What I Learned From My Hair

 

 

Early in May I dropped a Facebook update where I complained about my hair:

My hair can't decide whether it wants to impersonate the hair of Donald Trump or Justin Bieber. Sadly, I do not approve of either. Sigh.

FB friends made delightfully fun comments to my hair-whine. One friend suggested that if it wasn't a Phyllis Diller hair day - it was a GOOD hair day! Another shared a picture of an animal with wild-crazy hair - the poor thing looked like it was wearing a lion's mane that'd been struck by lightening.

Amazingly (my FB friends must all be very kind), no one mentioned that I have this whine (although I mix it up - comparing my hair to different people/animal's noggins) pretty often...

actually, my hair seems to annoy me (mysteriously) on some kind of schedule - like every 6 - 8 weeks; interesting, yes?

The Donald Trump/Justin Bieber whine was after my hair (besides being long overdue for a cut - and hanging kind of sheepdoggish) decided it wanted to go the other way.

It's almost always parted on the right, but for a few days before my public whine it insisted on parting itself on the left. Why (and WTF)? Who knows. I kept pushing it the way it was supposed to go. I kept trying to force it. Until I didn't.

One day I brushed it the way it wanted to go - and voila, I almost looked human (ok, still a little sheepdoggish)! I still needed a haircut (badly), but my hair and I weren't fighting - and I wasn't whining about it (much).

So, what did I learn from my hair?

To allow, to trust our Square-Peg leanings, our Square-Peg Selves (even when it's just our Square-Peg hair) - even (and maybe especially) when we lean away from the status quo. Jeez, kind of odd that this is my "thing", my message (self-acceptance/self-love/self-trust) - and my hair needed to remind me of it!

I also learned to get the damn thing cut, maybe on some kind of schedule (schedule, what's that?).

Postscript: I (finally) got my hair cut the other day and I'm loving it. All I do is wash - finger fluff (that sounds odd, doesn't it?) and go. No curling iron, no swearing - (ok, there's still plenty of swearing - it's my nature).

But I passed a mirror last night and wondred (aloud, of course) if my hair didn't look just a little bit (and I'm not whining here, just noticing) like the dutch boy (paint can kid) or even Julie Andrews in The Sound of Music.

I'm not quite sure why I have to find somebody in my hair - why can't it just be hair? Why does it have to be Phyllis Diller, Justin Bieber or...? Bizarre Square-Peg trait, maybe.

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Pssst! There are loads of lessons to be learned from our bodies - maybe you have one you'd like to share (pretty please)?

I've shared a few more of mine here on the blog (the Body Image/Body Love category - especially in our Body-Part Wednesday posts - has a number of them), including:

what I've learned from my feet, in Fun Feet,

my shoulders, in Body-Part Wednesday V,

and some wisdom from my friend Maripat (Luna) Oberg in My Left Breast, where she shares (well, obviously) what she learned from her left breast.

Making Friends With Time

 

 

Marney Makridakis has done it again!

Through the years I've taken a lot of Marney's classes. As a matter of fact, waaay back in 2004 her You*U e-course gave me the skills and courage to launch Square-Peg People (not to mention introduced me to many wonderful friends!).

Before that, in 2002, I learned the skills and focus to make things happen in her Goalar course.

And before that - an e-Book she co-authored, Awaken Your Interior Designer (probably the first e-book I ever bought), gave me the skills and self-knowledge to re-do a number of rooms in my house so that they reflected more of who I am and what I love - which gave me more energy throughout the day!

Marney IS inspiration (with lots of skill-sharing thrown in)!

So I wasn't surprised when I got my advance copy of Creating Time and found it full of paradigm-shifting exercises (and skills - and inspiration) around the subject of time - a great big TIME SHIFT in a book!

My first thought, on opening the book, was: Marney is taking on Time - and I know who will win!

But I quickly realized that a fight metaphor didn't fit. Marney didn't fight time - she wooed her.

It's as if she made friends with Time, and therefore Time gave up her secrets to Marney to share with us. Thank you, Marney - I think we all wanted to be Time's best friend, and now you've made that possible!

In my first read-through of Creating Time I let the energy and inspiration soak in. Plus I took time to enjoy the art work and words of some of my favorite people (Marney is very inclusionary: she brought friends and co-workers in, throughout the book, to share their perspectives - and their art!).

Going through the book again I was so awed by the many paradigm shifting exercises that I couldn't decide which to attempt - but Marney must've seen that coming, she created a chart.

To personalize the reader’s process, Creating Time contains a “Time Diagnosis Chart” which identifies 14 of the most popular time complaints, and recommends which of the book’s tools are most effective in addressing them. *

You might wonder how this book compares to time management books. Me too - and Marney's got the answer to that:

How is your book different from a typical "time management" book?
Time-management books, as well as the latest time-tracking and productivity aids, can certainly be of help to us on the practical level, but they are limited in their long-term effectiveness, since the true nature of time extends beyond the chronological hours displayed in our calendars, wristwatches and smart phones. I really wanted to dive into the psychological, philosophical and emotional aspects of time, to help readers come away with a liberating new view of self and a fresh perspective on the meaning of being human, empowered, and fully alive. So while the book is definitely filled with practical, hands-on tips for creating more time in your day, it’s also about finding a new way to experience time in its entirety, your full time on this earth…shifting our focus away from how we spend time to instead reveling in what we receive from our time. And, besides, most time management books won’t guide you to make collages and design offbeat new clocks and creative time-pieces! While intensely practical, I also wanted the 14 time shifting projects in this book to be a lot of fun and inspire a sense of playful abandon and freedom.*

Like all my favorite books, this one includes a lot of stories. I love reading how and why someone comes up with a particular approach - and also how and why it works for them (and, in this case, how it works for many others!).

If you'd like to befriend Time - and come away with some of her secrets, Creating Time is a book you'll want to check out!

*Excerpts from a Q & A document put out by Marney's publisher, New World Library.

 

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Want to learn more about the inspiring artist and author of Creating Time? Check out Square-Peg People's Interview with Marney Makridakis (yep, she's a Square-Peg too!).

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(Full Disclosure: we're affiliates of Amazon.com - so when you buy from the book links above you don't pay a penny more, but you help support Square-Peg People. Thanks!)

Know When to Hold 'Em

 

 

The other day, as part of my dedication to X-treme self-care, I was headed upstairs for a nice soak in the tub. On the way up I grabbed the book Sin Boldly.

I'm trying to weed out my books - send some on to their next home. And I figured that Sin Boldly would be easy to part with - I could reread it while soaking, get out and toss it in the thrift shop pile.

In the past I've looked at books in what I'm finding is a less-than-healthy way. Which, not coincidentally, is the same way I've looked at people.

I've looked at people (and books) with the expectation (hope, desire) that all of them stay around forever. Ok, maybe it's involved a teensy bit of (previously) unrecognized need to hold on to them forever (subtle, but significant, difference).

I so see how this is a result of my childhood, but let's skip that story for now.

Over the past couple of years the Universe has shown me that it's not all that helpful/healthy to hold on to all the books (or all the people) that come into my orbit.

Sometimes I've been shown this in an abrupt manner and I've been less than thrilled (just sayin').

When I scanned my bookshelves for a toss-able book, something that'd be easy to let go of (no finger-prying necessary), I chose Sin Boldly because it was written by journalist Cathleen Falsani, who refers to herself as a born again Christian.

Ofttimes I want to bite people when they get into preachy mode. Even Anne Lamott, one of my favorite nonfiction writers, has drawn this response (not actually biting her, but definitely wanting to!).

I figured it was quite possible for Sin Boldly to make my teeth hurt (the biting thing).

So Sin Boldly went into the tub with me.

Well, don't you just love when you absolutely know something - when you know, know, KNOW it - and you're wrong?

That happened!

Cathleen Falsani started off with a quote from the brilliant, heart-opening writer, Frederick Buechener (the post above, A Great Big YES! is the Buechner quote) -

who happens to be a Christian that I've never felt the urge to bite (even though I have almost all of the prolific fellow's books, so I've had chomping opportunities) -

Great start! And, it turns out that Sin Boldly is about grace (a subject that always grabs my heart) - which is pretty obvious from the subtitle, A Field Guide for Grace, but escaped my notice (and memory - I did read the book when I first bought it) when I pulled it off the bookshelf. 

Falsani 'gets' that grace is hard to nail down, but she still tries - I LOVE that! I went through the book a couple times to find ONE description of grace to share with you, but it's hopeless - the book is full of stories of grace, but nothing T-shirt slogan short, except...

where Falsani specifically mentions a T-shirt: " 'Grace doesn't deny my assholeness,' Jean said. (I immediately had the urge to put that on a T-shirt.)"

This is from the chapter where she writes about meeting a pastor (Jean Larroux, nicknamed The Screaming Frenchman) who moved back to New Orleans after Katrina - who further explains grace:

"I mean, I come into work and I've got all this stuff going on and I snap at somebody and I'm just a real, live asshole. And grace in that moment, you can't neatly package. It's somebody throwing their arms around you and saying, ' I love you, but you are an asshole.'"

{Falsani adds} "Yes, but you're my asshole, I envision God saying."

Who could thrift shop toss a book that combines (positive) asshole-speak and grace? Not me!

The book just kept getting better - and I never once felt like biting Falsani!

So, Sin Boldly will not head off to the thrift store...

but I will continue weeding through my books - trying to remember to hold them (and people) loosely - while realizing that I don't do that too well.

Do you ever have trouble knowing what to hold on to and what to let go of?

A Great Big YES!

 

 

"Listen to your life.

See it for the fathomless mystery that it is.

In the boredom and pain of it no less than in the excitement

and gladness:

touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden part of it,

because in the last analysis all moments are key moments,

and life itself is grace."

 

Frederick Buechner

 

What Frederick said (with bells on)!

 

Pattie Mosca & Permission Slips...For Your Heart & Soul

 

 

I met Pattie Mosca back in 2005 at an Artella Retreat - and later had the privilege of interviewing her for Square-Peg People.

She's a gal who wears her heart on her sleeve, reaches out to people when they're hurting (I can personally attest to that) and makes art that always brings a smile to my face.

Pattie's been published in many (many!) popular magazines - and is now the proud mama of her first book, Permission Slips...for Your Heart & Soul (published by Story People - wow!).

Pattie agreed to answer a few questions about Permission Slips - which I share below (the interview questions are in brown, Pattie's answers in black) - and also shared some of her artwork from the book with us.

You can see more of her art on our Square-Peg People Interview with Pattie Mosca page - and speaking of Pattie's art - go order her book, it will not only help you remember to give yourself permission, but her art will bring a smile to your face for sure.

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(I know that you wrote briefly about this in the Introduction of your book, but...) Can you tell us how, or what, got you starting writing a book giving people permission?

In 2008 I began the year on a direct route to following my hearts dreams by submitting artwork to national magazines without fear! I called it "the get known nationally now tour"!

But right in the middle of my dream I was faced with the knowledge that my good husband, Michael had an incurable cancer and we were given the prognosis of 3 to 5 years.

POW! Right in the gut, and I stopped living my life. I rarely painted anymore, writing became only a small portion here and there, and rarely did I go out with friends.

Mostly I did this out of guilt...guilt that I was healthy...guilt that I was living...guilt that if I did things for myself that would be selfish. And I became a "caregiver" to my husband, doctors appointments, hospital visits, paperwork, all the household things. Life changed for me.

One day, a friend asked me what I was doing, and why wasn't I taking care of myself. What would it take to allow myself to do that, because you have to take care of yourself in order to really take care of someone else.

PERMISSION...that is what I needed. But from whom?...MYSELF!

So I started making myself a permission slip every week in an art journal, for those things I needed; a nap in the afternoon without guilt, laughing, finding something to smile about all day long.

And to my surprise the more I made the slips, the better I felt, the better I felt, the better I could take care of Michael.

By the end of the year of making those slips (52 of them) I felt pretty darn good even though my life was drastically changing. And as I felt good those around me felt good and the snowball effect of living life to the fullest took place all around me.

In 2011, toward the end of Michael’s life, I was having a very hard day and I pulled out that 2008 journal of permission slips to find one that I could use to help me...when I had a moment that said other people need permission too, that I couldn’t possibly be the only person who was not giving it to myself.

So I put it out to the universe...I shared my heart with Storypeople and they saw the value in giving ourselves permission and now that journal is a book for everyone!

My good husband passed several weeks before I actually found out that the journal was going to be made into a book, but he believed in me and kept saying “when they publish your book it is going to be so great, and help so many people. I am so proud of you”. And I know that he is!

Do you have a favorite permission slip, or one you find yourself using the most? If so, would you tell us which one and why?

This is my favorite permission slip…Rose-Colored Glasses Day. 

Maybe it is because I have a sort of “pollyannish” out look on life! Especially during the time that I was doing this art journal.

 

This permission slip allowed me to see things in different way…My husband and I began to LIVE life with cancer. We choose to take the time that we had and enjoy the smallest of moments. We began to see things in shades of pink instead of grey.

 

Lots of people did not understand how we could laugh and joke while he was doing treatments, but we found that it served our hearts and souls to honor the time that we still had together, even if we were looking through rose colored glasses.

 

What part does art play in your personal permission (or, let's say - in your acceptance of your Self)?

 

Art is such an important part of my life, and by giving myself permission to do it when my muse shows herself allows me to stay true to my heart.

When I did not allow myself permission to paint or write I was well aware that there were pieces of ME missing. I knew that I was making myself unhappy by taking this important part of me and putting it to the side.

Once I gave myself permission to honor myself again…OH, how much better I felt, how much stronger I felt, how much more ME I felt.

What about your book do you think will grab the hearts of Square-Peg readers (you know, folks who resonate with the term Square-Peg)?

I myself am totally a square-peg person, never feeling that I quite fit in anywhere as a whole; and never more so than before I had started this journal.

This book allowed me to be uniquely me and begin to live the life that makes me who I am.

I think as square-peg people, we try to conform to what others think we should be doing, or we should be like, or how we should act. These permissions slips allow us to be our unique self.

We so easily give permission to everyone else, family and friends, but rarely do we give it to ourselves. Sometimes we just need someone else to give us permission. Sometimes it just takes that one slip that allows us to give ourselves more permission.

It is my heart's desire that at least one of these 52 permission slips resonates with the heart of readers. That they use them to catapult more permission for themselves in order to be true to their own heart, dreams and desires.

GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION!

Authors and Ego

 

 

I know two people who put out happy-helpful, brand spanking new BOOKS this week!

I'm excited for their new readers (how cool it would be to experience their work for the first time), I'm excited for all readers (because good books are FUN!), I'm excited for the authors themselves, and (oh sh*t, here's my confession)

I say this blushingly, and confusedly (because I don't 'get' why my ego is making such a big deal of this): I'm probably even more excited about being able to say "I know them".

I'm so excited about saying that I know them that I've stayed away from writing anything about their books here (or on FB or Twitter) - because I knew it was weird to be more excited about saying I know the authors than the fact that they each put out a way cool book (note to self: see if there's a local chapter of Egos Anonymous - or maybe Confused Egos Anonymous; if not, start one).

Let me get this out of my system: I know Pattie Mosca and Marney Makridakis (and there's probably at least a 50/50 chance that both of them could, if pressed, pick me out of a line-up -- not that I'm planning anything that'd get me into a line up - just sayin').

Ok. As exciting as that is (and I'm sure you've yet to catch your breath - grin) there's more:

There are Square-Peg interviews with both of these gals in the archives - where you can find out how they see themselves as Square-Pegs, what's been the hardest for them, how they maintain their Square-Pegness in a round-hole world, their favorite books (and more)! You can read them here:

Square-Peg People Interview with Marney Makridakis
and
Square-Peg People Interview with Pattie Mosca.

And - on Monday I'll be sharing an in-depth interview with Pattie Mosca about her new book, Permission Slips...For Your Heart & Soul - and soon after I'll share a review of Marney Makridakis's Creating Time: Using Creativity to Reinvent the Clock and Reclaim Your Life.

I'm just SO excited! (And so we're clear here: I've been talking about two cool authors, but only ONE ego - mine.)

Seeking Perfection

 

 

How close do you get to perfection - in anything - ever?

Yeah, that's what I thought - me neither.

Years ago, on a family vacation in Lancaster County (Pennsylvania Dutch/Amish country), I saw pamphlets and signs stating that Amish quilt-makers intentionally added a mistake to each quilt they made because only God is perfect - and they didn't want to upstage God.

I got annoyed every time I thought about those notices (and I went on an amusing rant about it in a post called Those Damn Amish Folk)*.

The notion that perfection is attainable persists, though. Something in our culture (or is it something inside us?) leans toward the belief that there is a way, a path, to perfection. And that someone, somewhere, is walking that path. At least it feels like we all (at least sometimes) keep looking for that path.

The truth is: perfection is b.s. None of us has it - and nothing we create will have it either.

The other day I (re)realized how important it is to share our mistake stories.

My reminder came in an e-mail update from a friend writing about a beautiful project she'd developed. She mentioned that the project was already out of her hands when she found a mistake.

Her beautiful project wasn't perfect!

After all her hard work, after all her checking and re-checking. After the project was sent out into the world, then she found a mistake. Ugh!

I didn't respond with "Ugh!" though, I actually smiled. I might have had a different reaction if my friend had tossed her project out without love, if she'd just thrown it together - if she didn't care.

Reading about the mistake in my friend's project (the one she poured her heart into) felt heart-opening. Not because I wish her ill (I don't) - but because it's encouraging to read confirmation of what I know: that I/we aren't perfect, I/we can't achieve perfection (except to be our perfectly imperfect selves) - in ourselves or our products.

Knowing that someone else "gets" that (my friend's e-mail update was grace-fully and deeply wrapped around the concept of perfect imperfection) felt good.

And there's something connective (¿the glorious team feeling of "we're all bozos on this bus"?) about the universality of imperfection. When people share their stumble-steps on the path to glory I feel close to them!

There are a number of my stumble-step stories on this blog. That's because I think it's as helpful to share our less-than-perfect stories as it is to share our moving-forward and happy-dappy stories. It's important to share our wholeness - and imperfection is part of our wholeness.

One of my favorites is a mistake I made describing an e-course that concentrated on self-acceptance.

When I explained what the course was about I wanted to make a point that it did NOT waste your time evaluating (or working on) what was wrong with you, but was made to help you assess what is right with you.

It was supposed to read: Want to Find Out What's Right with YOU, NOT WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?

Unfortunately, instead of capitalizing and emboldening the phrase NOT WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU as I'd planned on doing - I made a typo and "NOT" became "NOW"...

so my words asked whether you wanted to find out what's right with you - and then - in bold capitals asked:

NOW WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?

Kinda like a Mommy Dearest Academy class - oy!

One of my latest (oh, there are so many!) bloopers involves the gorgeous 2012 quotes and photos calendar that Slightly-British Daughter put together. We just realized that the calendar didn't upload correctly from it's original file - somehow September and December ended up with only 29 days in our imperfect (dare I say, Square-Peg?) calendar.

{FYI - Slightly-B reformatted the thing and uploaded it again - and you can download (or, re-download, if you downloaded it earlier this year) the new, improved, normal calendar here - because I'm pretty sure Square-Peg shortened months won't catch on.}

So, how close do YOU get to perfection - ever? What if we encourage each other to do what we can with our projects (and our Selves!) - keep moving ahead with love (not meh or half ass stuff) but maybe give up seeking perfection? What do you think?

*An online search today for those those intentional Amish quilt mistakes yields nothing - nada,zip - only denial and information about "the myth", so maybe you won't find those pamphlets and signs in Lancaster County anymore. Good!

What's Calling You?

 

 

What's calling you?

Yesterday morning the ocean called me - I heard it and I went.

Ok, I didn't go - it's a couple hours drive to the ocean and I was up to my ears in re-dos, projects and other work...

but I did seize half an hour out of my day to take a soak in the tub (with bath salts, of course).

Now - what with only having a regulation sized tub, in possibly the tiniest bathroom on earth (5' X 6' with heels, if bathrooms wore heels), I couldn't do much to create the whole wild-waves thing of the actual ocean - but it was enough (I plan to sit by a real lake this weekend, but that's another story).

Believe it or not, my bathing habits aren't the reason for this post. What I want to talk to you about is self-care - X-treme self-care!

I did hear the ocean yesterday. When I let my pup outside for a romp the gusts of wind were whooshing crazy-wild, like ocean waves. And the neighbor's disharmonious wind chimes clanged like buoys. I felt an internal pull to head to the water.

I needed water. Something happens when I'm around it: I feel more grounded, more myself. I feel connection - to Source, to everything - and everyone (including mySelf).

Water is one of the tools in my self-care toolbox - and I'm beginning to realize that I'm all about X-treme self-care and that darn toolbox!

I've learned that in order to be my BIG self in the world - in order to connect in a healthy way, give and take freely and deeply - I first need to revel in self connection and self-care (and YOU do too, I'm writing this to remind both of us!).

It's the oxygen in the airplane thing again.

So, in order to work X-treme self-care, I pay attention (ok, that should read: "I try to pay attention" - because, in all honesty - I don't always remember) -

and yesterday I heard the ocean calling. I needed to be near water. I'd prefer ocean, but a bath did nicely - and there's that lake trip in the works. I wonder what will call today...

How about you - what's calling YOU today? Will you pay attention?

Photo credit: Karen Caterson (can't you just tell when the pictures are mine? lol)

Whacked in the Air

 

 

I woke up knowing I wanted to share this funny experience with you, no doubt due to the fact that someone dear to me is on an airplane today.

But, by the time I got to the computer (argh) I had forgotten what I wanted to share - and no amount of brain strain was bringing the thought back (double argh).

I got lucky though - someone on Facebook wrote about the opposite experience and I had a voila moment - I remembered that this is what I wanted to share.

Here it is (a blast from the past), I hope it brings up your (good) goofball traveling memories:

 

Airport Etiquette

I haven't flown much (or at all) in the past 30-some years. That changed this past summer when I went out to Portland to visit my friend Wendy.

And again when I went to Saluda, NC to be part of Barbara Sher's WriteSpeak retreat. Nevertheless - 6 flights isn't a lot of flying - so I wonder if these experiences are unique to me?!?

Going home from Portland I was dragging. I never sleep quite soundly in any bed that isn't my own beloved home-bed (no matter how comfy and delightful) - plus we'd been busy - so, like I said, I was dragging.

I lagged behind as Wendy speedwalked from the parking area. She even hoisted my ridiculously heavy backpack and carried it as far as she could go into the airport and I still lagged behind. What can I say? Wendy's a mover and I'm not.

When we reached the "get-the-hell-out-of-here-ye-without-tickets" spot inside the airport I hugged Wenders goodbye, grabbed my wheel-less enormosity of a backpack and went through the checking in stuff and on to finding my terminal (always the furthest from the airport entrance - how is that even possible?).

Aside: I (brilliantly) discovered wheeled luggage for the NC trip. Godbless the folks who came up with it! - actually, I had noticed the wheeled luggage earlier - just didn't get why it'd be a big deal - duh.

All the time I was dragging - and the d r a g was getting worse. Finally it was time to board the plane and I lifted the god-awful heavy backpack once again and trudged onto the plane.

Miles later, when I got to seat 306, I was really tired - it took every bit of strength I could muster to heave the outrageously heavy bag up and shove it into an overhead bin. Unfortunately I had to do this twice, because the first time didn't work.

Instead of launching the backpack right up into the overhead compartment I only hurled it part way -- and onto the head of a fellow passenger.

And here's where the airport etiquette comes in - the guy turned around and asked me if I was ok! Really! Before he even had time to feel for lumps he asked me if I was ok. And he asked emphatically - worriedly! I laughed out loud! I was so tired I could barely walk, wasn't much in the mood for talking - but LAUGHing I could still do and I did!!! Very energizing. I managed to squawk out: "It was you who just got beaned! Are YOU ok?" - no response - didn't seem to compute for him.

Continuing with the twisted etiquette - a few days ago I was on the first leg of the trip home from NC - boarding a tiny plane going from Asheville to Charlotte. It was almost take-off time and no one had come along to take the seat beside me - ahhhh.

But at the last minute an older gent (a larger, oldish gent - in a wale-less corduroy or crushed velvet jacket the color of which I can only call "puked wine" -- if I remember correctly - and wasn't hallucinating) ambled in and claimed the window seat (I was on the aisle).

He offered to take either seat, which was lovely - but wanting the aisle for this trip I gladly got up to let him get to his seat. Ouch! I hit my head on the roof of the plane (what I want to call the "bulkhead" - though I have no idea if that term is correct).

Immediately the older, interestingly dressed big guy said "I'm sorry." Fervently and sweetly. But it was as odd as the guy in the other plane who asked me if I was alright even though I was the one who hit him on the head with heavy luggage.

I laughed (again - I seem to love to laugh on airplanes) and reminded him of the obvious - he hadn't done a thing - I was the one who clumsily whacked my head. Then I went to sit down - and whacked my head again. And again he apologized, profusely this time. It was less amusing and I felt the need to explain that I am clumsy and he was not to blame. Jeez!

I'm left wondering - is this a thing? Is this airport etiquette? Maybe I need to test this out - take some more flights -- whack some more people with bags, smack my own noggen on a few more bulkheads...I'm not sure where I'd go with the research, but it'd be interesting to see if this is common on flights. Anyone out there have similar experiences? Any theories?

Where Do Ideas Live?

 

My mind keeps going back to the conversation my friend Charlotte* and I had yesterday...

we got talking about (among a # of other things) how it is that some people are inundated with ideas and some people struggle coming up with them.

I'm one of the inundated folks - ideas track me. I love the flow (usually - although I will get cranky when I lose focus on something because of 10,000 other somethings - just sayin').

Like I said, my mind keeps going back to this. I'm intrigued by the fact that some people have trouble generating ideas. So, earlier today, I thought about it (a lot!).

And even considered whether it's possible that there's an Idea Gene or somesuch that only some people have (which goes against what I believe about who we are/how we're made/the essence of creativity). But then I had an aha! thought.

Or rather, I had an aha! experience. I got stuck!

I was in the middle of writing up a to-do list for today, stopped when I couldn't figure out how I was going to work on one of the to-do items - and stayed stopped. Stuck! Quicksand stuck (something I had recurring nightmares about as a child - damn Lassie and the quicksand episode!).

I realized that, though I have a continuous flow of ideas in a wide variety of areas, I don't have that flow in all areas.

And the aha! was: idea-stuck happens to everyone. We all have it somewhere. Some people have a lot of idea-stuck. Other people only have idea-stuck in a few areas.

The flip side (side A) of that is - we ALL have ideas, which fits with what I believe about everyone being creative. No one is missing the Idea Gene.

When I got stuck today I went to my current favorite form of play (drawing metaphorical maps) and let the drawing pull me in. I got out of my mind (hahaha)...

as I drew I started to loosen up - ideas came to me. I knew what I wanted to do next to get moving on that to-do list item. I totally lost the idea-stuck.

And there was a second aha!: PLAY is where ideas live!

We all (everyone!) open up to ideas (wherever we're stuck) when we play. Because play takes us out of black and white thinking, logical thinking, fear and knotted up thinking - out of our minds. It loosens us up and lets our ideas come out of hiding.

What do YOU think? Have you ever had PLAY break your idea-stuck wide open? If so, what kind of PLAY? (and - slight aside: anybody else remember Lassie and the quicksand?)

 

*{Editor's Note 3/8/12: My friend Charlotte, mentioned above, is writer Charlotte Rains Dixon (@Wordstrumpet on Twitter) - and ohmyword, when we were talking (about all kinds of things) we talked about her new class,

Cultivating Your Creative Ideas, (that's how we got into discussing ideas in general) but I had no idea she was offering it SO soon. This woman knows IDEAS, go check out her class - it's offered at a great price!}

p.s. this is not an affiliate link - it's a love link : )