Square-Peg Reflections

That's My Boy!

I miss Manchild - he's away this weekend - helping with the set up and then dismantling of the annual Peace Fair. I miss hearing his loud guitar - and I miss him, so I'll reminisce.

He's a multi-faceted dude. There's the peace facet, which includes volunteering at the Peace Center, taking training in Mediation, and attending Quaker Meeting. There's the animal lover and bug rescuer facet, which includes being vegan, stopping everything at any second to go racing off after anyone's loose dog, and escorting bugs out of our house (rather than exterminating, which'd be my unenlightened exit of choice for bugs).

There's also the musician facet (the biggest one), the tattoo lover (with two done and lots more planned), the baseball player, work-out fanatic and a bunch more. But the one I'm thinking about now is humor. Manchild has a wicked sense of humor. And he's so patient with it. I would want people to know if I was doing a practical joke - my favorite part of any joke, story or practical joke is the response - but I think Manchild's favorite part is thinking it out.

We found out about one practical joke he set up months after he did it - and only because someone else told us about it. It's my favorite Manchild prank ~

A few years ago Manchild was active on Acid Planet, a site where people share their music - reviewing and rating each other. My jazz musician-brother, his uncle, helped Manchild get set up there - and would comment on music that Manchild uploaded.

At some point Manchild created a faux-musician (well, faux-person really), Janet, with godawful music and frighteningly unreserved yak. Janet became a fan of Manchild's uncle - which meant his uncle had to wrestle with how, or whether, to critique the horrific music Janet uploaded. He totally hoodwinked his uncle, which was the plan.

If you follow this link you can hear 2 of Janet's songs, which are (sadly) still floating around on the interweb. They are awful, wickedly awful, diabolically planned awful. They sound, in their awful way, exactly like what you'd expect from Janet.

We know what to expect from her because Manchild put up a profile description that would acquaint us with Janet's heart and soul:

Hello my name is Janet. I'm in high school i love my friends my life is very good. I was born in new york 17 years ago, My dog's name is za zaaap, He's so cute, I love taking photos and making key chains and little hearts out of paper, I love my boyfriend he is soo nice, I love all my friends joe tom billy maya ash tim there all great, I love to make home made fruit drinks, And i can even make them good on a good day lol, Bye

And here's some yak that Janet (oops, I mean Manchild posing as Janet) put up about her song, called "Why".

Here's a poem I've been working on called "why" and I made this song to go with it, I hope you like them both, and I've noticed that a lot of people have been telling me how great my music is but PLEASE, tell me something I can work on, I know my music might be a little better than yours, but its ok to give me tips really I don't mind, no one is above improvement. Anyway here's my poem, and I'm sorry you can't download this song but I'm really looking in to selling my music, Email me if you would like to buy a copy of this song or my other one "Living in the light. "The world is pain, and I am the world, why am i the world?  why must pain be my world?  why is my world full of pain?  why do baby's cry?  stop crying babies, they won't stop, won't stop, won't stop, and nether will I, why must I be the world?  why can't I be you and you be me?, why do people make babies that cry?  why why why?  die die die?  bye bye bye bye babies cry why?"

I guess I should be glad Manchild didn't put up a photo of Janet - he'd make an unattractive girl...

Hmmm that reminds me of something...last month - at a week long Quaker youth camping event that Manchild attended - all the guys dressed as girls for a dance they had (why? who knows - although I did hear that it's a tradition at this gathering - kids are weird). Manchild was, apparently, the only one who dressed as a pregnant girl. 

I wonder if I should be worrying about this guy...

Girl Scout Material

I found this Girl Scout sash during one of my recent decluttering escapades. I feel very attached to it, though not literally (harhar) - so I'm not going to toss it. 

Somehow it makes me think of excavating - digging up some old thing and trying to figure out what it was used for. It's interesting to look back at something like this and try to discover what the hell it means. What are those badges about? 

Looks like I was always keen on food - I mean, there's the mixing bowl badge and the teacup badge in the first row, the bar-b-que grill in the second, the teapot badge and the squirrel one in the last row...

I've got to wonder what I did with tea cups and tea pots to earn those tea-related badges though. And why two different ones - was one just for brewing or serving and the other just for drinking tea? I can't imagine.

And did they encourage little girls to play at a hot grill back when I was young? Do they still? Can you get on some kind of list to have a couple girls who are working on the grill badge to come over and cook?

What about that badge with the keys (in the first row) - what's that one about? I wasn't a latch-key kid. I didn't know any kid who had their own house key when I was a kid. So - what's with the keys? And they look like the real old keys - was there some mystery

involved? Did we have to stay overnight in a scary castle? If so, I've lost my memory of it - and what does that mean??

There are only a few of these badges that make any sense to me:  I always loved to sew, so I can imagine earning the dressmaker one (4th row). The water one (2nd row, with a beach ball) "fits" - I love the water - I could stay submerged forever. Although I don't remember ever playing with a beach ball, but we can just ignore the ball.

The man on a plate - what do you make of that? I like men - wouldn't mind having a soul mate handed to me (by the universe) on a silver platter, but I don't remember going for a badge in that...

The red cross (bottom row) and first aid kit (4th row) - um, really? Me?!? Doesn't fit! 

Maybe the only one's that's a perfect fit is the middle badge, third row. I have no idea what it is - but it looks like something that would spin and make you dizzy. I often feel like I'm spinning and dizzy and am pretty darn sure that when I feel the spin so do people around me - and I think I make them feel dizzy - so that one seems like me.

I wonder if you can predict the future from someone's Girl Scout sash - see the woman in the Girl Scout? Who else has a Girl Scout sash (or some equivalent) we can ponder? 

Overheard

1) "Do you know that story 'Handsome and Gretel'?"

Little Princess asked this recently. Kind of made me think she gets a bit more romance-style tv watching at her main residence than she does traditional kids' reading.

2) "Do you want to get run over by a car?"

"Do you want to get run over by a car?"

"Do you really want to get run over by a car?"

"Do you really want to get run over by a car?"

This was heard (in passing) in a parking lot (aimed at - as if you didn't figure that out already - a kid). There were a few other variations, but who can remember them all. The thing is - I "get" the frustration of the parent...

but really - what the hell are we expecting when we ask stupid questions like this?? And what is an appropriate answer - or better yet, what's a GOOD answer - a good response...maybe one that includes sarcasm, but isn't so rude that it engenders a smack?? Now that (the charmingly wise-ass remark that gets everyone laughing and no one smacked) would make a great piece of info to put into Snapple or Coke caps..yeah?

3) This last "overheard" wasn't overheard, I read it a few moments ago - in Michael Neills' book - You Can Have What You Want:

"Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to another, 'What, you too?

I thought I was the only one'"

C.S. Lewis

Great quote, huh?

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

This video has been ALL over the internet today. If you haven't seen it yet (and even if you have - grin) it's the cutest thing. 

We were at this Phillies game and watched as Werth sent the ball flying skyward.

We saw the fan make this outstanding catch, but didn't "get" why he'd throw the ball back. The video shows what happened.

Toward the end of the video you get to see how incredibly far the dad leaned over (from his seat about an inch below the clouds) to grab the ball - wild! The cute thing - the thing that makes this guy such a great dad - isn't his fantastic catch, it's his reaction to his daughter's "mistake" - ahhhhhh! 

There's An App For That

Nah, there's probably no app for cleaning the bathroom sink, but when I was nose-to-the-vitreous-china the other night I was wishing there was! 

I had a nasty coughing fit that sent me to the bathroom in search of steam. I had sharp firey pain in my chest - bronchials I guess - and all I wanted was relief. 

I plugged the drain and let hot water run into the sink, leaned over into the steam and breathed it in - and it was helpful. Relief! Great!! Except I came in with pain (which was eased), but left with something else - shame.

I've never been Mrs. Clean, but at least I knew when things were dirty. I could see the crud and be able to consciously procrastinate cleaning (hey, there are a lot more fun things to do in life). 

My vision must be going downhill though, because on close examination (and you can't get much closer than having your nose an inch above the drain plug) the sink looked  bad! Bad like - call in the board of health...that bad! 

Apparently now I'm not even aware of how much cleaning I'm putting off.

Sigh - and all this getting older awareness in my birthday month - not fair!

Really though, wouldn't it be cool to have an app for cleaning - something like a magic wand - I so want a magic wand!!

I GET to Pay Bills

I was sick last week (as I mentioned in yesterday's post) - but today I'm almost completely the charming, cheerful me you've come to know and love.

(talk about something to be grateful for!)

For a few days prior to realizing I was sick there was a sharp drop in my cheerfulness. I was Eeyore-ish - but worse - Eeyore's cranky cousin with none of the Donkey family charm.

When I noticed the increase in bitching and complaining I decided to pull the "I get to..." thing out of my bag of tricks. It's a helpful device that shifts the focus from feeling put-upon to realizing that we have choices.

What you do is - take any whiney/complaining statement that you make and turn it around. Restate it as an "I get to..." statement.

I wrote my mayo-sis and told her that for the whole day I planned to change my whines to "I get to..." statements every time I caught myself complaining.

Here's how that went (copied and pasted from notes to my mayo-sister and my journal):

I worked hard to get the newsletter out because it told about the final Body Part Wednesday post and give-away, and I got the d@$# thing done (which was a little tricky coz i'm not used to the new newsletter - this might have been the first one i sent out using the new program) - and the stupid thing didn't GO out when it was supposed to. When I checked on it, expecting that folks had it already, it said it's 'scheduled for a later distribution date' - for no good reason!

(I'm being kind here - copying only a bit of the note to give you the gist - the actual note - as my sister could tell you - went on way longer!)

I caught myself though - I turned it around right in the note - I changed it to:

i GOT to send out a newsletter..tho i've gotten to NOT send them out for such a long darn time..because i GET to be a terrible business woman so..i GET to be pissed that my hard work was for naught

and now i GET to have a headache on top of it...

I GET to be disappointed...

Here are more notes from later in the day:

We went out to the organic market and a thrift store, but I'm feeling sick...

I quickly changed that to:

i GET to feel sick..lol..nasty post nasal drip..sore throat, boo hoo

Then there was:

I GET to pay the effing bills today, when I GET to not be in the mood. 

(Look at that - I started out with the "I get to..." - didn't even need to switch it around)

Yep - I know - I see it too! I took a good idea and messed it up. It's so easy to twist things - even a great plan like an "I get to..." day.

But here's the funny thing - even though I went on and on (and on and on...) like that all day - changing whiney statements to whiney statements that began: "I get to..." - but were still whiney (or maybe a bit angry and whiney), I actually got something good out the deal.

Some of the times I'd start to laugh because I could hear how ridiculous I sounded. And sometimes I just noticed that I was not in a good mood. Noticing is better than not noticing.

And the "I get to..." thing - I've been using it more and it's starting to "take". This morning I was heading to the checkbook to pay bills. That's not usually a gleeful time for me, but I had some positive thoughts: 

• Getting the bills done now means they're off my mind for awhile.
• It's nice that I'm not doing the "rob Peter to pay Paul" thing (there was a time...).
• I'm grateful for so many of the products and services I'm paying for. 

Now look at that! Even Eeyore's crabby cousin can learn new tricks - and put them to good use!!

'Been Reading

I haven't been posting lately - or looking at the computer - or even sitting up much. It seems I've been flu-ed - or the closest thing to it.

I'm on the mend now though, and for the past couple days I've spent a little time reading whenever I got a little energy. One of the books I grabbed from the bookcase next to my bed was Refuse to Choose by Barbara Sher. It's a great book and I'd like to tell you about it...

But since I'm not exactly up to par yet I'm not going to yak much - but I'll share excerpts from the book review I wrote for the book review section of Square-Peg-People ~ Spa for the Square-Peg Soul. 

Sher's book is: 

an encouraging message to Scanners - those of us who are, in Sher's words: "...genetically wired to be interested in many things..." 

It's for people who often struggle with not finishing things, who wonder: how do I choose only one big passion, what if I choose the wrong dream to follow, how do I combine all my loves to make a living? 

I have a feeling that many Square-Peg-People are Scanners. To quote Sher, "Scanners are typically creative and not ordinarily tied to rigid thinking. They're the quintessential 'out of the box' people..." 

That sounds like Square-Peg folk, doesn't it? 

. . . . . 

In one paradigm-shifting sentence Barbara Sher notes that:"If Scanners didn't think they should limit themselves to one field, 90 percent of their problems would cease to exist!" 

As usual, Barbara Sher's book is filled with stories. You'll read about how Sher (a self-identified Scanner) cried with joy while looking over a college course description catalog - with the thrill of all there was to learn. 

. . . . . 

Like her other books, the advice offered in this one is not the "Put on your big-girl panties and deal with it" type comments or suggestions. She does not make it seem like all you need to do is have some will-power. Barbara Sher offers practical and specific advice.

. . . .     

The rest of the review is over here. And there are a lot of other books to read about in the Square-Peg Book Review pages. I think I'm heading over there now myself - to see what to pick up off the bookshelf next...

I Will Never Pitch in the Major Leagues

I learned something about pitching the other day.

Usually I get belligerent when Slightly-Brit explains the Phillies' pitchers needing long breaks between bouts - or why we can't have the same fantastic pitcher (i.e. whichever one is on a roll) every game - or even for a whole game (ok, we do get that every once in a blue moon).

I mean really- these guys get megabucks for being in the spotlight doing something a lot of folks would pay big ass money to get a chance to do. So why not do it more often - and for longer?

But I got a chance to pitch the other day - and I now know two things:

1 - pitching is quite a workout!!

and

2 - beyond a shadow of a doubt I will never have a major league pitching career. Which (to twist a quote from The State) is the sad fate of so many middle-aged, out of shape women pitchers.

Manchild was heading down to the fields to practice hitting balls out of the park. I asked to go along. I figured it'd be a help for him (and some exercise for me) to have someone pitching to him, rather than him just throwing the balls in the air and then swinging (yep, he does that sometimes!).

He said sure. So I went along. And I tried. The first thing that was a problem was distance. I couldn't throw all the way from the pitcher's mound to the batter's box - not even in the Little Little League field. And Manchild didn't want to be in the Little Little League field, he wanted to hit balls out of the big ball field.

We stayed in the Little Little League field til I got my pitching distance figured out. Turned out I was best when I was somewhere near arm's length from the batter's box. Nose to nose might've been better, but I didn't get to try that. Of course, when I say that I was "best" at a close distance I don't really mean I was any good. Sadly.

On the walk over to the fields we'd discussed how I should throw. It seemed that underhand would be best for getting the ball in at the angle that Manchild wanted. But experimentation proved that underhand was all wrong.

I couldn't seem to find a balance. Manchild had to either dance or duck - balls raining down on him in wild sky-high archs or glancing sharply off his ankles. It's amazing how hard a ball can hit you when it's thrown from a few feet away! Anyway, I tried a number of times. But, apparently, I have zero control when throwing underhand.

So we advanced to overhand throws. Which - as Slightly-Brit and the Phillies' pitchers could've told you - takes a real toll on the arm. Overhand I could at least get balls in the vicinity of the batter though - maybe not the right address, but at least in the neighborhood.

But Manchild wasn't loving it. He said I had no power - and that gave him nothing to work with. I thought the fact that he was getting most pitches to sail out to the 275 ft mark was pretty good. Until he showed me what he could do without my poor pitching. When he threw a ball up in the air with one arm - quickly swung the bat up with the other and then got both hands on the bat and in proper position - he knocked the ball out of the park and into the infield of the next ballpark over. Repeatedly!

What a batter! Too bad he's more interested in music than a baseball career - one of us might've made it to the big leagues...

The Final Body-Part Wednesday Give-away Winner!

is:

 

Lorraine!

How's that for getting in on the butt end of the thing - lol! Lorraine, I will email you  to get your address and your bone sigh and CD will be sent to you snail mail - cool!

To everyone who participated throughout the Body-Part Wednesday blog party (whether thru comments here on the blog, on facebook or emailing me personally): Thank YOU so much!

It's been fun hearing other people's views on body issues/body-image/body-acceptance - and body humor! This week especially - you guys had me rolling!

I refrained from commenting after each comment came in - which was so hard - but I wanted to experiment...I had been wondering if my yakking after each response would be kind of intrusive (or overbearing) to some people  -  so I thought I'd back off and see if it made a difference. I didn't see shyer types commenting more - as opposed to emailing - but I'm also not sure I did the experiment wisely (or long enough??? - I'm no scientist..can you tell?).

What I did see - besides the incredible sense of humor you all have - is that there was talk between people - like community - and THAT made me so happy!!

I'd love to find ways to do more of that - open this up for more discussions between people and I am very open to hearing ideas (oh, throw out some ideas or I'll have to make up more experiments..and you can see how good I am at that..lol).

Also -  we'll keep having body talks here - Slightly-Brit has already altered our Body-Part Wednesday button - she crossed out the "Wednesday" and put "Any Day" on it...so future body image, body-awareness, body-acceptance yak will have the new button - which I'll show you soon - yea SBD! - she's quiet, but sooo invaluable!! (and you have to watch the quiet ones, you know that, right?).

Ok, "hip hip hooray" - or is that "hiney hiney hooray" to Lorraine for being our final Body-Part Wednesday Give-away winner! And another whoop for all of us - for talking about body issues - which can be kind of heavy (no pun intended! really!!) - it's felt, to me, like talking over the fence in the old days - thanks!!