Heart-Opening Reminders of the Shiny

(or: It's Not All Shit)

Things have been less than smooth lately. Blame it on Mercury, or Murphy's Law - or don't blame at all - just call it Life (shit happens). Whatever. The thing is, when shit happens (or hits the fan - or covers everything because of a plumbing backup, flood or ?) it is SO lovely,

so heart-openingly necessary to remember that the sun still shines - that life is made up of more than shit. That there's a whole lot of not-shit out there - a whole lot of shiny!

I have been so blessed recently - I've been nearly swimming in internet reminders - posts that point to the shiny, that glory in the more-than-shit of life.

And I want to share those blessing with YOU, because I figure that you're likely to need reminding at some time too.

fyi: oddly (or not), most of the blog posts linked relate to grieving in some way...

Heart-opening reminders of the shiny:

1. Slightly-British Daughter pointed me to this post - it's by artist, teacher, journal-maker Mary Ann Moss, and was written after her beloved cat was attacked (she witnessed this) and died (in her arms).

The post celebrates her cat's life, and is very touching...then there are the comments - ohmyword! The comments are such an outpouring of compassion and care (most from people who say they've never met the artist) - they make my heart smile!

2. Slightly-Brit pointed me to another blog post - where Brooklyn Whimsy & Spice owner, Jenna, chats about the "bane of my domestic existence" (laundry). And again the comments! The 4th comment, from a woman named Karen (not me), where the commenter shared about her issues with laundry after her husband died, and the over-the-top help of a hardware store worker - OH! There's so much love in the world - it's so heart-opening!!

3. Body Aware Grieving is a new-to-me blog, written by body worker Margo Rose, who's learned to incorporate body awareness into dealing with grief. Margo says, on the blog, that "it was not my intention or preference to become so informed about grief." But that's what Life handed her - and she has gifted us with the results of what she's learned.

This particular post, Grief Funny, talks about an experience the writer and her mother had when her mother "was losing her battle with breast cancer." It celebrates the silly stuff - bright spots - that are often there during the hard stuff.

4. Maribeth Doerr wrote open-heartedly about the difficulty of the parent roles being reversed - about (very compassionately and respectfully) helping her parents consider moving out of their home and into a place that would be safer for them.

Then, very recently, her mom died (unexpectedly) - and Maribeth now writes about moving her father into her own house while grieving her mother. She is going through very tough times in many areas of her life, but she still writes with hope (and honesty! Hers is not a fake-the-happy blog!). Her latest post, Sometimes It's Overwhelming, and Then Magic Happens is a big heart-opener!

5. I was thinking about Jane Cunningham all weekend - because I was reading a book that had me fall in love with New Zealand (where she lives). I wandered over to her blog this morning to see what she was up to and found this incredible poem - talk about heart-opening! It's called Sometimes I, and starts:

"sometimes i feel invincible, bullet proof, made of divinity
and sometimes i feel tiny and crushed"

I love how Jane courageously shares her truth - the opposites she (we!) live with - her poem felt like a benediction.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I hope these links help your heart stay open, remind you of the shiny - and I'd love it if you shared YOUR favorite reminders. What have you found lately that helps you remember it's not all shit (even if you're standing in a pile)?

Comments

[Alana]

These are lovely. Thank you for sharing.

[Dagny]

Karen,

You HAD to come back with something like this, didn't you..? More after I've read the links.

To have you find time for writing this, THAT's heart opening for me. :))

Dagny

[Angie Mizzell]

Cheers to the not-shit! Love this post. If we can't find one thing shiny in the midst of the shit, we're in big trouble.

[Square-Peg Karen]

You're welcome Alana - I'm so glad to have found these heart-opening links & I'm thrilled to share them!

[Square-Peg Karen]

Oh, Dagny - you always bring me a smile! I'm so glad that I was able to be open to these. Sometimes it's hard to stay open when things get rough! Kinda think you know what I mean!

[Square-Peg Karen]

YES, Angie!! And I've been in trouble - lol - sometimes (like I mentioned in my response to Dagny's comment) I find it hard to stay open enough to find and appreciate the shiny.

Love your "Cheers to the not-shit!" - made me laugh (outloud, of course!!).

[Charlotte Dixon]

I can't read the one about the cat because I'll be upset for days, knowing the cat died. However, what a great group of posts, thanks for sharing.

And by the way, I prefer to think of it as "shift happens." Helps sometimes.

[Square-Peg Karen]

Oh, Charlotte - first I giggled and then I gasped! What you said about thinking of "shit happens" as "SHIFT happens" - wow!

I could've made my subtitle: It's Not All Shift -- and pointed to how there are spaces between the shifts where we can catch our breath - and how good those spaces feel sometimes.

But then I would've have gotten to use a four letter word - grin. I DO love that thought - thank you for sharing it here! It's a good one to remember.

I hear you about the cat story - stuff like that can stay around & harm our hearts. Good that you know what's best to stay away from!!

[jane]

oh my Karen i am so honoured... i was so enjoying the post, thinking about how wonderful it is when people reach across the internet ether and touch each others hearts and then there i was... thank you my far away friend

[Merry ME]

Karen,
Your bookmarked blog has been sitting unread on my desktop for ages. I find it interesting that tonight when a shadow of grief seems to be hanging around my shoulders like a shawl, is the night I read this post with grief connections. I think I shall take a warm shower, and dish up a bowl of ice cream, then visit some of the sites you mention.

I love it when magic happens, especially when you've given up believing in magic.

[Square-Peg Karen]

I love the hearts-across-the-internet-miles too, jane! And thank YOU for posting such an awesome piece that I was SO glad to share!!

[Square-Peg Karen]

Merry ME, I'm so glad you re-found the bookmark to this blog at just this time (that IS magic, isn't it?)!

Grief around your "shoulders like a shawl" is a beautifully poetic description - but OW! it does sound heavy. I hope the combination of warm shower, yummy ice cream and some heart-opening posts help the shawl slip down a little and give your shoulders a rest!!

I'd like to point you toward another post that might be useful - we've (Slightly-British Daughter and myself) been changing things over - closing down the site little by little, moving things over to this blog -
and there's a post on grief that you can't find on the site anymore, called Allow, that (like I said earlier in this ridiculously long paragraph) might be a help to you:
http://www.squarepegpeople.com/allowing-grief.php

Thanks so much for visiting and commenting!

[Lisa]

I've been whooping it up at my own pity party lately and frankly, this party is lame. Thanks for reminding me it's not all shit. Life is good.

[Square-Peg Karen]

Thanks for commenting, Lisa! You're so right, life IS good -- but it's also got that shit stuff, and I'm glad you see both (there's just something whole, in my mind, about someone who sees both!).

Glad also that you gave yourself a pity party. I'm all for pity parties - and for knowing when to leave the party - here's to some "it's not all shit" (or even "wow, yea, wow!") days!